Protecting the Flock
Developing policies to prevent sexual abuse and to protect victims of domestic violence in your congregation
Why are policies important?
When the leaders of Grace Community Church became aware of allegations that a Sunday school teacher had engaged in a sexual relationship with a teenage girl in the congregation, it lit a firestorm. Two of the elders immediately rejected the allegations. The girl was known to be a “troubled teen,” and the accused was a respected member of the community. The pastor and another elder faced an uphill battle in their efforts to look into the matter. Finally, the young man was confronted, and to the shock of all, he confessed. Yet this confession launched a new crisis. Some of the church leaders argued that the man was young and made a mistake, that he should be forgiven and restored to his teaching role. Others declared that the girl was underage and the situation was serious. They said the abuser should be suspended from the Supper for his sinful behavior.
“What none of us imagined,” the pastor later told us, “was that the guy was still doing it. We had assumed this was just a relationship with one teen, and he seemed so regretful. But the whole two years that we were investigating, counseling, working on reconciliation, squabbling about what to do—he was carrying on a relationship with another underage girl! Nobody had thought about keeping him away from the other teens. It seems obvious in hindsight that he was a risk. We should have had a policy in place, but it never crossed our minds! None of us even thought about calling Child Protective Services.”
Stories like this are incredibly common. Church leaders have many responsibilities with the day-to-day life of the congregation. Until it happens, the possibility of abuse allegations feels distant and unlikely—not worth taking valuable time to consider. Church leaders may see stories in the news about other churches dealing with such things, but they feel safe in their environment. It won’t happen here! Not here in this nice church where we know everyone!
Only when sitting across from an abuse victim telling a horrific story of sexual assault or violence do church leaders begin to wonder what they should do. But as Grace Community Church experienced, a lack of policy leads to disunity and indecision—and finally to leadership paralysis that may allow abuse to continue unchecked.
The time for policies is not after an abuse allegation has been made. Wise church leaders prepare in advance, so that when an occasion arises, the church is united and decisive, moving forward in a way that seeks justice and provides safety for the entire congregation.
“Rescue the weak and the needy;
deliver them from the hand of the wicked.”
Step 1: Prevention
Developing an accountability policy for church staff and volunteers
Church leaders are responsible for ensuring that children and other vulnerable individuals are safe in the building and in church programs. This begins by creating policies that discourage inappropriate relationships between adults and children and allow for safe reporting.
An accountability policy may:
Mandate that a minimum of two adults supervise any Sunday school class or other children’s activity, so that one adult is never alone with the children.
Require a clear lines of sight into all Sunday school classes. Ideally, all children’s Sunday school rooms and nurseries should have windows in the doors.
Ban private and inappropriate communication between adults and children. Private communication with children should pass through parents. It should not be texted or emailed directly to the child.
Allow for safe reporting. Make a plan for how the church will handle any allegations of inappropriate behavior or communication between staff and children.
Require reporting of any sexual or physical abuse of children to Child Protective Services promptly.
Some churches also require background checks for volunteers. While this can be helpful, church leaders should not overly rely on background checks. Most abuse goes unreported, and many child sexual abusers have no criminal history. There is no substitute for wise implementation of accountability policies.
REMEMBER!
Abuse is almost never confined to a single victim. If one victim is verified, church leaders should assume that the offender is a risk to others in the community.
Domestic violence and sexual abuse cannot be solved by marriage or family counseling. It is not recommended that victims be placed in a counseling situation with the offender.
Sexual abusers can be either male or female! While female offenders are less common, research shows that as many as 20% of perpetrators of child sexual abuse are women.
In many states, church leaders are mandated reporters, required by law to report any child abuse to the authorities. Churches may also be held legally liable if they fail to take reasonable steps to protect children from a known offender in the church community.
Step 2: Protection
Developing a response plan for allegations of ongoing abuse
While accountability policies offer some protection for children on church property, these rules cannot completely erase the possibility of abuse within the congregation. Furthermore, preventative policies do not address abuse situations in congregants’ homes. Church leaders must also consider developing a policy for responding to ongoing situations as they arise. What will the church do when a woman complains that her husband gets into drunken rages and punches holes in the walls of their home? How will the church respond when a teenager reports that her uncle has sexually abused her since she was ten years old?
Here are some key features of a response plan:
Train staff and volunteers regarding the definition of abuse and how to respond to disclosures.
Prioritize the safety of victims. Do not confront the offender until you ensure that the victim is safe from retaliation.
Reach out to appropriate resources. If the victim is a minor, the church should report the abuse to Child Protective Services immediately. If the victim is an adult, be prepared to assist with reporting to the police if the victim wishes to do so. Assist the victim with contacting local domestic violence or sexual assault agencies. Consider also referring the victim to the Presbyterian Advocacy Coalition.
When the victim is safe, hold the abuser accountable. Never assume that an offender has stopped abusing! Take measures to protect the church from an unsafe individual.
For more assistance on church policy development, contact us!
We are happy to help!